The reality today is that the computer has become an integrated
part of most people’s life. We use them for work, play, shopping
and when researching something like the possibility of hire a private
investigator. The same is true for cheaters. They send e-mail to
the “other” person, they look at websites about sexual
performance, weight loss, infidelity, how not to get caught, etc.
etc. In a growing number of cases, people are meeting and developing
relationships on-line. They are in chat rooms having on-line conversations,
posting messages to discussion bulletin boards and visiting web
sites to meet people. Frequently these relationships grow from a
cyber-affair into a real world relationship. These can grow into
regular e-mailing and instant messaging about how they feel toward
one another and what they are up to. Accordingly, the computer can
be a treasure chest of information that can help a spouse or loved
one who is looking to know what’s going on.
Once you “meet” someone on-line who
sounds exciting, sexy and interesting, you spend time learning about
them and fantasizing about how they look, how well they relate to
you, etc. As the “relationship” goes on, the two get
to know each other better and the real world begins to enter the
conversations. Trust develops because this is the person “you
relate to” and it builds up as more time goes by. It then
gets to the point where they begin to be even more honest, sometimes
totally honest, and a real relationship outside of cyberspace can
develop.
Absolutely. Too many of our clients consult with us and state their
disbelief that their loved one would be trolling for sex on the
internet. The reality is that, like affairs at school, work, church,
the health club or any other social environment, it usually happens
quite innocently and grows. Do not underestimate this format for
people meeting and growing close. It happens daily, in every town
across the country.
There are also those who are not looking for
a boost in their self esteem or have a relationship, rather they
simply want sex with someone they don’t know. This sub-culture
is comprised of men and women who use the computer to meet other
people who want commitment free sex. They are attracted to the excitement.
They like to type stories about fantasy and sex. They look for others
who share this desire. It is important not to stereo type these
folks. They are not just “stripers” or the “dirty
old man” wearing a trench coat. This is your neighbor, the
soccer mom, the teller at the bank, your accountant and potentially
your partner. This group uses the computer the same way those looking
for true love do. They visit certain sites, e-mail, chat and instant
message.
As private investigators we see it everyday.
Clients whose spouse or loved one is cheating on them and carrying
on the relationship on the internet. We STRONGLY recommend that
you consider handling things yourself and install one of these discreet
software programs to get your own proof. They are EASY TO INSTALL
AND USE. You don’t need to be a programmer or high end computer
user. Installation and use is easy and can be done by anyone.
Be aware that these programs work in stealth,
but there are other software products available that are designed
to locate spy software on a computer. It is also well known that
products like these exist and some cheating spouses will be aware
of the potential for you to monitor their activities.We also advise
that you consult with an attorney or law enforcement in your area
to verify the legality of using such spy software programs where
you live. We are not attorneys and cannot attest to the circumstances
under which someone can employ these programs to watch someone else’s
activities.
If this is the case and you know a bit about
computers, we have just the right tool for the job! KeyGhost is
NOT software. It is a small device that you plug into the back of
your PC which does all the work software based keyloggers do but
cannot be found by spyware detection programs. Record and retrieve
everything typed, including emails, chatroom activity, instant messages,
website addresses, search engine searches and more. No software
installation is necessary to record or retrieve keystrokes!
Advantages of KeyGhost Keylogger:
- Easy to install in a few seconds! Simply plug it in. Installation
pictures.
- It records every keystroke, even those typed in the critical
period between computer switch on and the operating system being
loaded.
- KeyGhost even captures and displays key combinations such as
Ctrl+C, Alt+F and Ctrl+Alt+Delete, making it easy to understand
exactly what was typed.
- Keylogger works with any PC operating system, and stores a
continuous log even across multiple operating systems on one computer.
- No software installation is necessary to record or retrieve
keystrokes. How?
- It has a capacity of up to 2,000,000 keystrokes stored with
STRONG 128-bit encryption. (This is approximately 300,000 words,
or 1 years worth of typing).
- Keylogger features looping memory so you will never miss the
most recent keystrokes.
- Impossible to detect and/or disable by using software.
- It is a very user-friendly keylogger, you do not need to kow
how to program to use it. Simply plug the device into the keyboard
cable.
- The log in the KeyGhost cannot be tampered with. It is an authentic
record of what was typed, and therefore, it may be used as strong
evidence in a court of law.
- KeyGhost Hardware Keyloggers have been extensively tested for
over 5 years on almost every brand of PC, and have received many
positive independent reviews. You can be sure our Keyloggers work
as advertised.
If that won’t get the job done, there are
a seemingly endless number of software programs that can help you
to monitor a computer and get the proof you need. Our private investigative
agency has experience with many and we have presented those that
we think can get the job done correctly and reliably below. Be sure
to review them in detail and get an understanding of how they work.
We are confident that all of them can be run by anyone. You don’t
need to be a PI or a computer programmer to use them.
With spyware being as sophisticated as it is,
this type of monitoring device is very difficult to locate without
extensive knowledge of computers and their operating systems. Fortunately,
there are several equally as sophisticated programs available to
help detect spyware someone is using to watch you, all at very affordable
prices. These programs can be installed by anyone and do not require
paying an expert to come to your home or know your private affairs.
If you suspect that this could be happening to you, we encourage
you to visit these software providers who we feel offer excellent
products to assist you:
E-Mail Tracing
If you know that your loved one is receiving e-mail from a certain
person but you don’t know their identity, help is available.
As trained licensed private investigators, we have the ability to
trace most e-mail accounts or e-mails back to the sender. Not all
e-mails can be traced and several types of “anonomous”
e-mail accounts exist, but the majority of e-mail accounts, including
AOL accounts can be traced back to the sender.
At A.S.G., we charge $425.00 flat rate for our
basic e-mail trace. This includes the name and address of the owner
of the e-mail account that sent the message. If we cannot get you
the owner, we charge $ 100.00 and return the remaining $ 325.00
immediately. Note: if you need this done for litigation purposes,
the cost will vary inasmuch as additional procedures will need to
be employed to hold up in court.
Is Viewing Internet Pornography Like
Cheating?
According to Nielsen Net ratings, 17.5 million users visited Internet
pornography sites from their homes in one month. It’s a growing
trend that has many people worrying about their relationships. So
is it normal, or is it cheating? Here’s what Dr. Phil McGraw
has to say:
If you’re looking at Internet pornography,
you need to determine if you have a problem. Ask yourself these
two questions:
Would you do it with your partner standing right
there?
Are you turning outside your relationship to
meet a need that should be met within the relationship?
Your answers to those questions should give you
an idea of whether you have a problem. You should also consider
how your behavior affects the people around you. You might say that
looking at pornography online is harmless, but it could have a negative
emotional effect on the people you love.
Conversely, you may be hurt because your mate
is looking at pornography online. You have good reason to be upset!
That sort of behavior is disrespectful to the relationship that
the two of you created. Talk to your partner. Explain that the pornography
has to go—no ifs, ands or buts. Don’t accept excuses
like "Everybody looks at porn" or "It’s just
the Internet." That attitude speaks volumes about the health
of your relationship. Your partner has to choose what’s more
important: pornography or the relationship?
From the show "Dr. Phil" on
Adultery:
We enjoyed the following article about on-line cheating and how
you can catch your spouse.
Net Ensnares Cheaters in Tangled Web
Sunday, December 14, 2003
By David Koeppel
NEW YORK — Adultery was once kept a secret. Not online.
The Internet dating (search) craze is blazing a trail of
broken marriages, thanks to dozens of sites inviting participants
to identify themselves as "not so happily married,"
"married but that shouldn’t matter" or even
the seemingly archaic, "married but we swing."
Studies show some 30 percent of online dating visitors are
married -- and recent research by the University of Florida
(search) reports that what starts out as flirting and cybersex
quickly escalates into the real thing.
The Internet became an easy escape for "Barbara,"
a 43-year-old married New Yorker who dated about 60 men in
three years until she met Steve, who’s also married
-- but now sneaking around with Barbara.
"We see each other once or twice a week," she says.
"We have a lot in common, have a great time together
and the sex is phenomenal."
She says a cold husband sent her surfing for more. "There
was no warmth or any physical affection," she says glumly.
She tried cajoling her husband into seeing a marriage counselor,
but after only one visit, he refused to return. She didn’t
want a divorce because of their 7-year-old daughter, so she
posted an ad online.
"I’m not interested in jeopardizing my marriage
or anyone else’s," she said. "I just wanted
to find someone special I could click with."
Other women interviewed say they’ve been searching
for deeper emotional relationships than their husbands are
able to give -- but aren’t ready to leave.
"I guess the sex just isn’t what it used to be
when we first met," says Nicole, 28, a married New Yorker
who’s listed her profile online. "I miss the feeling
of sex being new and exciting. It’s addicting."
Addiction is something that Chris Samuels, the co-director
of a sexual addiction treatment center, understands all too
well. She has treated many married and unmarried patients
who’ve gotten caught up in Internet lust.
"Its power is almost trance-inducing," she says.
"You can troll these sites and have a fantasy ready and
waiting. Cybersex can provide a quick and powerful high. It’s
like crack cocaine to sex addicts."
Alfred, 49, is a self-described Internet Lothario who says
he’s been "swinging" for 23 years.
Before going online, he would post ads in "swinger magazines,"
sometimes waiting two to four months to set up a first meeting.
Now his desires can be gratified almost instantly by posting
ads on the Internet.
"While I’m open to a relationship, I’d prefer
someone I can meet for no-strings mutual sexual pleasure on
a continuing basis," he says.
Alfred’s new online ads generally attract several interested
women ("I’m a seller in a buyer’s market,"
he says proudly).
He usually hooks up with married women, but says there are
plenty of singles who don’t mind that he’s already
spoken for.
Unfortunately, while these spouses are sowing their wild
oats, there’s likely to be someone at home who’s
getting hurt.
John LaSage, 43, from California, could attest to that --
his wife left him and his two teenage daughters to take off
with an Internet boyfriend.
The experience led him to create chatcheaters.com -- a Web
site designed to help dissuade potential cheaters and to comfort
those who’ve been hurt by them.
"Chatting is OK, cheating is not," says LaSage.
"People should realize how quickly relationships can
form online. Flirting can lead to real-world affairs."
If you suspect your spouse of having an online affair, "Bring
the issue out into the open," he says.
"Look out for the warning signs" -- like excessive
Internet use, new email accounts, turning off the computer
when you walk in the room.
Pepper Schwartz, a professor of sociology at the University
of Washington and the relationships expert for online dating
site Perfectmatch.com, says married men are much more likely
to say they’re just looking for sex than married women,
but ultimately the search is about loneliness.
"... It’s about gratification," she said.
"They want someone to find them attractive, someone to
want them passionately."
But not every married person who’s gone the online
route has found the affair of their dreams.
Wayne, a 49-year-old man from New Jersey, complains that
his inbox is usually cluttered with undesirable partners and
a fair share of transsexuals and cross-dressers.
But that may be just the ticket for 34-year-old "Rockerdude"
of New York City, who advertises online that he’s hoping
to make sweet music with men, women -- and anything in between.
"Yes, I am married, but we have a very liberal, open-minded
relationship," he writes.
With additional reporting by Michael Shashoua |
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